My New Blog Page Is Waiting For You!

Did you forget that I recently launched a new blog page?

2 months ago I excitedly announced that I launched a brand new site for my blog and that I will no longer be posting to this one. But…somehow…none of you have chosen to follow me on over to the new site! 😦

So I am posting once again here, on the old page to remind all you fabulous mamas to please subscribe to my new blog page so you can continue to follow me! I’ve got new content and a slightly new look so you don’t want to miss out! Click here to go straight to the new site and make sure to put your name and email in the subscription box so you never miss a post!

I am so excited to share my new blog site with you! I hope you enjoy the things I post and please leave me comments and follow me on social media! I love hearing from you guys!

I just published my Christmas post, so if you still don’t have everything you need for your kids this year, you need to check out the amazing gifts I’ve linked to in my latest post!

So why haven’t you followed me yet? Go do it now! I can’t wait to see all of you sign up to my new site, so head on over and put your info into the subscription box! Here’s the link again so you can do just that. Never Alone Mom

Thank you beautiful mamas! See you on the flipside! ^_^

Your Girl, Jess XO

On Your Own, But Never Alone

http://www.neveralonemom.com

 

 

My New Blog Site!!!

I have a new blog site guys!!!!!!

Ok, so now that you know….it’s time for you to check it out and subscribe! I have been wanting to upgrade my blog for some time now. My goal is to have a blog that really reaches women and shows who I truly am as a mom, business owner, writer and…geeky goofball. I have been saving up money all year to afford to own my domain for my new blog site and it finally happened! It’s taken several months, hours and hours of hard work, lots of bugs to work out and too many re-deigns to count but….it’s ready! It still isn’t perfect, but I just can’t wait anymore! I want to show you all my new site and start on a new blogging journey with all of you. So….withut further ado…..(drumroll…) This is my new blog site!!!!!!!!!

 

http://www.neveralonemom.com

 

I am so super duper excited for you all to join me there, and continue to follow along on my single mom adventures as well as other topics I will be covering over on my new blog such as home business news and tips, ways to save money, DIY’s, personal stories and parenting woes and so much more! And to start us off I have a new post already up and ready for you! So don’t miss out on what’s there and all that’s to come! I will be having some guest bloggers along with some fresh content coming soon! So please head on over to the new site and put your name and email in the subscription area on the top right-hand side. I don’t want you to miss all my posts, so go and subscribe now to stay connected with me!

Thank you all so much for reading my blogs and staying with me so far, you guys are rockstars! I can’t wait to go on this new blogging journey with you and I hope that you enjoy all of my content and always stay in touch with me through your awesome comments and sharing with your friends! Are you ready? I know I am! Let’s do this! 😉

Go click on that link right now, if you haven’t already and subscribe right up top on the right if you’re on a computer, and down at the bottom if you’re on mobile. Don’t forget to check out my new post that is up too! Let me know what you think and share it around! This is going to be so amazing, yay!!!! (does goofy dance)

Thank you all so much! Love you and can’t wait to see your faces on the new site!

Always your girl,

Jess XO

How I Make Working From Home As A Single Mom…Work.

So, confession time. Being a single mom is hard…like, super hard. I guess that isn’t really much of a confession, is it? I’m sure you yourself know quite well how hard it is. But, for me, it’s harder than I ever anticipated. When I was faced with the reality of raising my son on my own, without his father being in the picture I thought “ok, no big deal, we’ll be fine. Women raise kids on their own all the time. I’m strong, I can do this. Who needs ya!” But now as my son is getting older…I’m struggling to make it all work without much support around it’s not getting any easier, especially with a tough littler stinker like my son.

Now add working from home to this and well….I’m sure you can already see my sanity flying right out the dirty window…but it’s a choice I made the moment I found out I’d be expecting this little bundle of….joy (in a sarcastic tone). I had always planned on being a work from home mom, it’s something I firmly believe in. I have always felt that mothers belong home with their children, and if a second income was needed or if she simply just wanted her own ‘thing” other than the whole housewife stereotype, then a little work from home business was the perfect idea. But I just never thought I’d be alone, with no husband to help support us. So…here I am, sticking to my guns and my beliefs about motherhood and after 6 years and many unsuccessful tries and wasted time on failed ideas, I now have my own home business.

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

I love working at home for many reasons other than just my firm belief that it is the right thing to do as a mother. It allows me to homeschool my son, which is also a huge importance and it also gives us more time together each day and more freedom and flexibility to just live life and not worry much about schedules or me having to leave him with strangers. It is my job to teach him, raise him and help him grow. So, I have to make it all work. No matter how stressful, how difficult, how soul crushing, headache inducing or social life destructing it all is. Every second is worth it to know that I am doing what is best for my child by giving him me, all day, every day. So how exactly do I make it work? Let me break it down…or at least try to anyway…

Financially:

This is one of the biggest issues with working at home being a single parent. Without another person bringing home the bacon, it’s all up to me to provide for the two of us. Some months are not exactly worry free, in fact, most aren’t. But since we live with my parents, that helps a great deal in that department. I still have to pay for all our separate bills, food, clothes, and everything. So pulling in enough income to keep us going is quite the struggle. My business is still new and growing, and I  have a long way to go before I can say I am a successful business owner, but with my super skills at budgeting, and finding all kinds of ways to save money and pinch those pennies I think we do pretty well. I hustle like a momma should, work hard and go after my goals. With time and plenty of sweat and tears, we will make it on our own and God willing be able to finally live in our own home. It’s a work in progress people. So as long as we have pizza and Netflix we’re good. ‘Casue…those are the important things, right? 😛

Time Management:

As for managing time for work, school and free time I have a pretty simple system. I mainly work at night. Partly due to having bad internet because we live out in the remote country and partly due to needing to focus on work with constant distraction to stop and scream at my rambunctious and sometimes seemingly possessed 5-year-old. So, every night I stay up long past even when most night owls have slipped into dream land, and I get shiz done. Then during the day, there is more time for home schooling lessons, daily chores, and even some writing. I also give thanks to using a day planner to creatively put down all the daily to-do’s, shopping lists, tv show schedules, appointments, and reminders. I use fun stickers and washi tapes to make it something I actually want to take the time to do. Using a really well put together planner with lots of room and space for writing is a must for any busy mom or business woman.

WELCOME

Plan Outings:

Another way I make it all work is by panning out the specific days to leave the house and run errands. Knowing what day you’re going out days ahead of time really helps. Usually once a week we make our trips to town, which for us is over an hour’s drive being out so remote in the country. We go grocery shopping, drugstore runs, pet store,department store, thrift store and everything else in one full day out. Then plan next weeks trip or decide we don’t need one and skip a week. It’s great to spend a day out remembering that I am in fact a human, that there are other people out there and feel how nice it is to not wear sweat pants for a day. It helps with so much!

Lastly, I make things work by my sheer motivation. I stick to my reasons for doing everything I’m doing and no matter what the obstacles, I make things happen and keep our little family going. I enjoy being a crazy mompreneur. Well…sometimes, and every sanity losing moment is well worth it.

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

For more insights on working from home, being a single mom or the tons of other tips, stories, and advice I love to share, please “like” and subscribe to my blog! And don’t forget to find me on social media! (Links below)

Much love, your girl,

Jess XO

5 Fun Activities To Do With Your Kids This Summer

5 Fun activities to do with your kids this summer.

So, it’s summer. This means hot weather, long days and sometimes boredom. If your children attend school it also means summer break, which keeps them home with you all day. Or like me, if you homeschool it just means way more free time for the kiddos. So what’s a crazed single mom to do all summer? Don’t worry, I got you. I have come up with 5 fun activities to do with your kids this summer. From water play to adventures with colorful balls, we got this.

Activity #1: Make your own backyard water park.
For the kids and inner kid in us, bringing the water park home isn’t very difficult and putting it all together as a family would be a fun way to spend an afternoon together out in the sun. All you need to bring this water park to life is a few small kiddie pools, a plastic slide (big enough to fit you if you plan to slide, if not then little kid sized will do.) A water slide, or you could even make your own using a sprinkler head, a hose, and a tarp. A spinning water sprinkler head, or some sort of fun water toy that attaches to a hose, and basically just any other water toy, activity or even just an adult sized wading pool will complete your backyard water park. Pretty simple and is sure to keep you and the kids entertained and cool without having to drag them to an overcrowded and expensive water park.

Activity #2: Make your own ice cream and set up a full ice cream bar.
Have your kids ever churned their own homemade ice cream? It’s a great lesson in how things are made, learning to do something themselves and for building up those ever growing little muscles! Just simply invest in an old-fashioned ice cream maker, all the ingredients for as many ice cream flavors as your heart desires and get to churning! Then once it’s ready to eat, set up bowls of tons of toppings, and pile on the goodies! Chocolate syrup, M&M’s, Gummy Worms, Nuts, Sprinkles you name it! Have ice cream cones, fun bowls and whatever else you’d like and have fun! Who doesn’t want to have an ice cream party on a hot summer day? You can count me in!

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

Activity #3: Outdoor Movie Nights
Wouldn’t it be neat to sit out just after sunset and watch a movie outdoors on a summer night? Uh, yeah! Well, you can! Here’s how to make it happen. If you don’t have the budget to just go out and buy all the expensive outdoor theater equipment, here’s the easiest and cheapest way to do it… search online, I recommend checking Ebay first for a good deal on a film projector. Used or refurbished will get you the lowest price. Once you’ve got the projector, all you need now is some old stereo speakers that can connect to the projector. Check all the wiring and connections for the best option for you. Then find a big white sheet as the screen. Hang up your plain white sheet on the side of your house or on a close line if you have one. You may need to use extension cords to plug in the projector and speakers, but that’s easy peasy. Put out blankets, pillows, lawn chairs, whatever you want to sit in, pop some popcorn and bam! You have your own outdoor movie night ready for your enjoyment. Pop in a DVD, light some citronella candles to keep the mosquitos away and enjoy your night!

Activity #4: ORBEEZ
If you haven’t heard of Orbeez and spent hours playing with them, I promise I won’t tell 😉 then you need to grab yourself some now! Go online and buy some Orbeez. If you aren’t aware, Orbeez are round, colorful semi-squishy little balls that are therapeutic and oh so much fun! You can put them in a kiddie pool to have some fun water play, or fill up empty tubes for some bouncy colorful summer toys, or throw them into some homemade slime or play dough for therapeutic fun. The possibilities are endless, and you can browse Pinterest for more ideas! So go grab yourself a ton of Orbeez like now!

orbeez

Activity #5: Washable Body Paint
Kids love to get messy so why not find a way to let them get creative and messy in a fun way, and you can get in on it too! Washable body paint is the perfect summer activity. You can paint yourself up like an animal, a super hero, a clown, let imagination take over, and just wash it off with ease in the bathtub! Let the kids run wild outside in their bathing suits covered in paint…no one gets hurts and it comes right off. Your welcome moms! Here’s a link to grab a set of face and body paints that you and the kids will love: https://www.amazon.com/PaintFun-Piece-Glitter-Paints-Approved/dp/B015HSBQ1G/ref=sr_1_18?ie=UTF8&qid=1467769378&sr=8-18-spons&keywords=washable+body+paint&psc=1

I hope these activities have sparked your creativity and have given you ideas for some summer fun! Do you have any more activities we all should know? Tell me all about them in a comment! And don’t forget to follow my blog for more, single mom …mom…ness!
Love and Joy,
-Jess XO

Finding time for quality time with your kids.

Life is crazy. Most of the day is a blur.

The hustle, bustle, dizziness and chaos of life as a single mom can be nauseating. How do you slow everything down and find time for a moment of quality time with your kids? It’s easier said than done, that’s for sure. But even though we are home with them all day every day it still feels like we never actually spend time with them. It only always just constantly feels like screaming “Get that out of your nose!” “Stop jumping on the couch!” “If I have to tell you to pick up your socks on more time…!”  “Eat your dinner or starve!” & “Be quiet!!!!” but no actual time spent with your children. Well, at least that’s how it is at my house. We rarely get a moment to giggle, play, cuddle or do an activity….I’m so busy, stressed and tired all the time and being the only parent it’s tough to even find time for a shower or a real meal. The importance of spending quality time with your kids is off the charts, it’s crucial and a must. But how? And when? UGG. So I’ve sat myself down and come up with this list of ideas to squeeze in a little mommy & me time for us single moms who are this close (imagine my thumb and index finger held almost touching) to losing our shiz.

Finding time for quality time with your kids: 

The Years Are Short

#1: Bathtime

Bathtime is a great time for getting in a little quality time. While they sit and soak in the tub we can take the opportunity to talk to them, ask them questions or even play a game or sing a song together. Blow some soap bubbles, smile and enjoy a few solid minutes of time together before you have to wash them up and put them into bed. 

#2: Bedtime

Then next comes bedtime. When we get them all tucked in, read a story and say our goodnights it’s a perfect time to squeeze in an extra moment of quality time. Telling them things you forgot to tell them during the day or tell them something to look forward to doing the next day, tell them a story about something they did as a baby, or even just read another story and ask them questions about it to get a conversation going and maybe teach them something new. It’s the time to unwind, settle down and just relax with your kids, and have a little bit of calm one on one time. 

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

#3: Sundays

I don’t know about you, but in our house Sunday’s are the days that we do absolutely nothing. We just sit on the couch and watch movies and chill at home and relax from a week of insanity and prepare for another. Sunday’s are perfect for just relaxing together, cuddling on the couch, coloring together, or maybe baking some cookies. Just take the day off from anything else you have going on and make it a family day. 

#4: First thing in the morning

For you moms who are conscious in the morning (I’m not one of them, I work night’s), mornings are a great time to talk about the plans for the day, any chores that need doing and ask them what they want to do before the day is done. Have a little time to talk together during breakfast and before the day starts really going. I’m so jealous (I think) of you mom’s who see the morning sunlight and start your days in the daytime…it must be magical….right? 

#5: Mid-afternoon 15-minute breaks

If we can take a few moments each afternoon to just pause, and take a breather I think it would keep both kids and parents sane. So if we can stop ourselves to step away from work and chores to go do a quick 15-minuete activity with our kids it would really refresh our minds and spirits. So if we’re not out on a  grocery run or on the soccer field, take a time-out from long days at home to just have a play time break. 

It's not about having time. It's about making time.

 

Do any of these ideas seem do-able for you? I hope you can try some of these to achieve some extra quality time with your kids every day and I promise everyone will benefit. When the days are long, hard and busy it’s so easy to loose track of time and allow all the stress to keep us from giving the time with us that our kids need. Battle on moms, fight the good fight and stay the course. Now go spend time with those snotty little buggers!

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Love, your girl, -Jess XO

Don’t forget to follow me on social media! 

The Pro’s, No’s, And Woes Of Online Dating (As A Single Mom)

The pro’s, No’s, And Woes Of Online Dating As A Single Mom
dating

Online dating, it can be fun…..right?

Ok girls, it’s time to get real. We’re single, and the world of online dating has become the thing…and it is inevitable. Well, for most of us. Seeing as the old school ways of meeting guys is well….old school. It’s very difficult if not darn near impossible to meet men the good old fashioned way, especially if you’re a mom. Getting out and about where we might have a chance of meeting any single guy just…simply does not happen.  If we ever do surprisingly run into a handsome fella like say, at the grocery store, we’ve got whining kids attached to our cart and that may as well be a big flashing sign that says “LEPER” on our foreheads.  No brave soul will dare come near, or even make eye contact.  It’s the truth. Men are terrified of us single mom’s…we have to admit it. And when it comes to meeting these gutless men online with all the savvy and fun apps and dating sites that are out there it makes the whole experience…easier….or does it? 

Now -a -days there is a dating site for everything and everyone you can imagine. So whatever and whoever you are, there is a match for you! Disney fan? Yep, there’s a site for that. Farmer? Yes, there’s a site for that. Got extra curves? Yep. There are even dating sites for women who love beards, golfers, sea captains and….vampires? So whatever it is you’re looking for, it’s out there. As terrifying as that may…or may not be. With all the options out there, every swipeable app and flirtatious sounding website, and with the pressure on from every family member, friend and lonely night about when we’re going to find a man,  we easily fall into the world wide web of what is online dating. Below are my personal Pro’s, No’s, and Woes.

  • Pro:  It’s easy, mobile & convenient. With most dating sites offering downloadable versions for your phone, you can carry around your own black book of single dudes. Get messages as soon as they are sent and get a notification every time your profile gets a “like”. You can check out these sometimes criminal looking guys anytime you like and chat whenever you find a moment in your hectic day as a mom. No stress. 
  • No: Disrespectful, educationless, rude and honestly horny guys. Sadly, in mine and most all other’s women’s cases, the majority of the men we connect with are about as dumb as a brainless scarecrow and extremely disrespectful to women in general. With no thought or care about our children, or to even spell a simple word correctly, they expect us to drop what we’re doing, dump our kid/s off with a babysitter and go “hook up” with them at their beck and call. Like dude, I just started talking to you fifteen minutes ago, and you want me to just run off and come meet up with you right now? Get real, as if. Men let their urges turn off their brains…apparently. I don’t even have a babysitter, wherever I go, so does my kid. Want to get me alone? Then you’ll have to marry me first you baboon, cause it’s not likely gonna happen as long as my kid is under 18.  Want to go out on a  date? Unless it’s out to eat might as well be plastic pizza at Chuck E. Cheese then yeah right.  Not cool?  Then fine, you lazy, uneducated, disrespectful, baggy pants wearing, horny, no good lame excuse for a man is so not worth my time. 
Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

  • Woe:  Scardy cats. Remember the flashing sign on our foreheads? Yeah, those pop up in the online world too. Once most guys find out we are moms, and we can’t/won’t abandon our responsibilities to go run off with them at a moment’s whim, hook up at 1am or let them come over they run for the hills. Men don’t go out looking for single moms, they just don’t. Most of them treat us as if we’re diseased….hence, the flashing “LEPER” sign we carry around.  They may seem sweet, understanding and nice at first until the conversation deepens or they ask to meet to up and we mention we have kids. We say”No, I’m sorry but I can’t. Maybe we can work out something sometime, though.” And 99.9% won’t ever even respond back. They’ve already left the chat window before even reading the rest of our message. They disappear in a flash of color, leaving skid marks and whatever was in their pockets behind them. Cartoonish sound effects included. Well, there goes that. Next! And the same thing happens every time, no matter now nice and mature the guy seems at first. As soon as they find out we have kids or that we can’t meet up in person right away, poof! Their magnificent disappearing act leaves up astounded. My kid’s own father wouldn’t stick around, so why should I expect some stranger to? There’s some reality for you. Don’t expect every man you meet to be patient and respectful of motherhood. Most aren’t.
  • Pro: Exciting, fun, and flirty. On the rare occasion that we actually meet a guy that doesn’t look like he should be on an episode of Cops, has a sense of humor and sticks around long enough to read the full message after they see the word “kids”, it can be kind of exciting to meet someone new, and start chatting with someone you hope looks as cute in person as he does in his profile picture. When he messages you on a regular basis, asks questions about you or even just asks “how was your day?” you get that little flutter, it never lasts long, but the fact that it’s possible to get it at all is itself miraculous. Cutesy emoji’s, being called beautiful or getting random messages throughout the day is refreshing and flirty, which can be fun.

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  • No: Dirty pics. Ok, it’s time to get even more real for a sec. Ever open up a message and to your shock see something….that makes you think if their camera aim and selfie game is …off? Yeah, we’re talking dick pic’s girls. Don’t be shy, you know it happens. More often than not.  Some will say hi first, other’s will not. Online dating is interesting, that’s for sure! You have to be prepared for the creepers, peepers, and nude pic senders. Just take it from ole’ Forrest Gump. “Life if like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get.”
  • Woe: Let’s go back to the first No, for a moment and discuss the guys who can’t communicate properly if their pathetic lives depended on it. I’m so sick of seeing the worst grammar imaginable, the most simple of words spelled incorrectly and oh my heavens if I get one more  “hey whats good” message I swear I’ll take a baseball bat to something. Doesn’t anyone know how to say hello and introduce themselves anymore? Why can’t a guy start a conversation the proper way? UGG. It’s so irritating and it makes me facepalm every single time. C’mon guys, really? 

So with all the pro’s, no’s and woes that come with online dating, is it really worth our time moms? What do you think? Are we fated to stay single for the rest of our lives?

Please follow my blog for more on my online dating journies and more topics I know you’ll love! Stay strong girls!

-Jess XO

Don’t forget to follow me on social media! 

 

What Is A Virtual Assistant Anyway?

Have you been hearing the job title Virtual Assistant online a lot lately?

Probably because it’s a pretty hot home career right now, anyone who is anyone uses a Virtual Assistant or (VA). Wondering what these VA’s actually do? Here are some answers!

I started my own home business as a Virtual Assistant a little over a year ago, I made the decision to become a VA after 5 years of struggling to find success in pretty much every home business out there. I needed to make money, I needed to have a “real job” I needed to stop wasting my time trying to sell every kind of fitness drink, mascara, vitamins, face cream, body wrap, online program or kitchen utensil on the market, stop trying to make money by posting ads, marketing for scammy companies, starting all these “home businesses” that made you pay a ton of money to get started only to not do what it promises to do and you find yourself in deep doo-doo. None of that was working for me, I had to do something else, and after going back to school to receive what ended up being a completely useless degree and wasted even more time and money I couldn’t afford to waste, I decided to go back to the drawing board and start over.

I had seen the term Virtual Assistant around the internet for a while, with all of my home business researching and making contacts with women running successful home businesses I decided to figure out what a VA was and if it was something I could do. Lo and behold I had found something that perfectly fit me, my skills, lifestyle and what I wanted to do career-wise. After a few months of training with a virtual assistant company, a few program courses and a spring in my step, I made the leap forward into creating my own business as a VA. I started with a website and a facebook page and things have been slowly taking off since then. Things are slow going but I have hope that I will reach my goals someday. Slow and steady wins the race! Anyway, so now to the main point of my little post…what is a virtual assistant anyway?

“A virtual assistant is someone who helps businesses or busy people remotely, from their home or office with administrative assistance. Seems pretty straight forward, doesn’t it? Virtual assistants are highly skilled professionals who leverage their talents and their time to help others check off their to-do lists.” -breagettingfit.com

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

A VA is (usually) a contract based professional who works from their home office to provide a wide range of services for businesses and individuals. Some VA’s only in specialize in specific areas such as websites, consulting, graphic design, or social media engagement. Other VA’s are  jack of all trade workers and do a little bit of everything depending on their skill level. So whatever your business needs, there’s a VA out there that does it and is available to help you and get those tasks checked off your to-do list. Now isn’t that just splendid? 😀

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

I mainly specialize in social media management, but I also do blogs and newsletters for small businesses and I love what I do. You can follow my businesses Facebook page (linked below) for all the updates on my little biz as well as how to get in touch with me if you’re interested in hiring me. Most VA’s also vary in their prices, skill level and business approach. No two VA’s are ever the same. They can also be found in many different places, just type in ‘Virtual Assistant’ in any social media platform, Google or job site and you’re bound to find that the internet is bursting with us. We are ready and waiting to serve you!

Working as a VA is a wonderful career because it allows my schedule to be flexible so I can homeschool my son, have plenty of time to keep up on household chores and the latest episodes of my favorite shows. I also can meet all kinds of amazing people and get the joy of helping them with things they need. I get to use my creativity and all the skills I’ve gained from those sad 5 years of struggle. It is a title I am proud of and I can’t wait to see how my business continues to grow.  Check out my new business website! www.myvirtualassistance4you.com If you have any more questions about what a VA does or how to become one or hire one, just shoot me a message! Follow my blog for more home business, stay at home mom and entrepreneur posts!

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Much love and many thanks!
-Jess XO
~Don’t forget to follow & share!

How To Be A Cool Mom On A Serious Budget

Mom On A Serious Budget? No Worries, I Got You!

When you’re a single mom, it’s hard to make ends meet….that is, when you don’t have one of those fancy jobs, because being a mom is already a full-time job and when there’s no man in the picture to bring home the bacon…things can be tough. Having a smaller income can make simple things like buying good quality clothes for your little ones, keeping up with organization, groceries, toys, and activities can be a lot and can leave you broke and struggling. Our kids come first and so making sure all of their needs are met and they have everything they need to be healthy, happy and stylish is a top priority. So what’s a mom to do? Read my blog for great tips of course!

I Like To Consider Myself A money savings guru….

For years now, since the birth of my son I have searched, scavenged and hunted for the best deals, the cheapest stores, the greatest sales etc and it’s much easier than you think to save yourself a few bucks when buying things for your kids or even keeping yourself from looking like an extra from The Walking Dead.  So here are my top tips for pinching those pennies!

CONSIGNMENT STORES.  You have probably heard of these or even have shopped in one before but consignment stores are a heaven send.  Trust me, once you’ve had the consignment experience, you’ll never go back! Not only can you buy gently used clothes, toys, books, bedroom furniture and more at a children’s consignment store for amazing prices, but they will pay you for yours! That’s right! When you’re kids have outgrown their clothes, toys, videos, bed sheets etc, and as long as they are still in great shape, the consignment store will take them, and you will have two options, you can either take the cash once your items have sold in the store, or use it as credit to buy things from the store! When I first learned about this I was mind blown! Just think…when all the items that you’ve donated have sold, you can use the credit to buy all new stuff from the store and therefore never spend a penny! Practically an exchange! Like what? How cool is that? Oh, and consignment stores are also for adults too! Just find one that sells woman’s apparel or any adult consignment store and the same thing applies there! I can’t tell you how many name brand, super cute clothes, handbags and shoes I’ve gotten for free just by selling things I no longer wear to my local women’s consignment store! Check out all the consignment stores in your area! You won’t be sorry and your wallet will be just as happy!

Free Online Printables. Need activities for the kids? Do they like to color? Do you homeschool? Well, the world of free online printables is your new friend! I use these printable activity pages, storybooks, color pages and homeschool lessons all the time for my son, no need to pay for expensive school books, coloring and activity books,  just search up what you’re looking for and simply print it out! Easy peasy.  Everything from toddler activities, preschool, all the way up to high school age activities and stories can be found online in a free printable format. Saves you time, money and keeps the kiddos busy! Here are some great websites to start you off! http://www.activityvillage.co.uk/printables-list    http://www.jumpstart.com/parents/worksheets    http://www.thekidzpage.com/colouring_menus/activities/

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

Dollar Stores & Thrifting. Shopping at The Dolar Store and thrift stores are a lot less icky than they may have been back when. You can actually get all sorts of treasures at these places. Everything from toys, party supplies, wrapping paper, snacks, home organization, school supplies and more can be found right in The Dollar Store.  Thrift stores are treasure troves, I love thrifting and hit my local thrift shops every month and never walk out empty handed. They are great places for finding play clothes, household items, movies, and things to use for amazing DIYs. Pinterest anyone? Don’t be afraid to shop these kinds of places, you won’t regret it if you do. 😉

Groceries & Coupons. So this may be a no-brainer, but when you want to save some dough when buying some dough, grocery coupons come in handy. I’m not talking go all Extreme Couponing on me and have a basement full of boxes of rice, packages of gum and sticks of deodorant but….coupons are wonderful. Clipping coupons seems like such a chore and let’s be honest…a little Stepfordy? So, I wish to welcome you to the new generation of couponing. Most grocery stores have rewards or member cards, if you don’t have one already, you need one. They’re free, so just ask for one at checkout. Once you get your card set up, you can go online to the store’s website and add coupons to your card, and when you purchase those items at the store and swipe your card you save all kinds of money. Boom. Also, there are websites that email you coupons you can print out and also ones you can use for various places online! Pretty awesome stuff if you ask me, so if you want to save a little money while running your errands, picking up dinner and so on, remember to get some coupons! Here are some websites for online coupons: http://www.coupons.com   http://www.coolsavings.com/coupons   http://www.redplum.com/section/printable-coupons

You. So, you’re a mom…and that means it’s nearly impossible to squeeze in some time for self-pampering and keeping yourself from looking like a mess. When you do find the time, it’s easy to splurge for a fancy mani-pedi, hair stylist, or facial. But are those things really necessary? They’re expensive, and when you’re on a serious budget it’s just not smart. So why not just do it yourself? You can! You don’t have to be a pro, or even really know what you’re doing, it doesn’t take much talent to keep yourself fresh and fabulous. With the use of the proper tools, you can give yourself your own manicure for well, nothing. If you need a little help, there are plenty of YouTube tutorials to help you out. Hair color need a boost? Instead of paying a crazy amount for someone to color your hair for you, just pick up a box of a good quality non-toxic hair color and do it yourself! Or if you’re too afraid of ruining it, ask a friend to come over to help and make a girls night out of it! No worries! For a deep skin cleansing and detoxing experience, homemade facials are just what you need. You probably have all the ingredients you need right in your kitchen! No cost involved and only a few minutes of time! Just whip up some skin food and slather the natural gunk on your face, and let it get to work improving your complexion. Just look up home facial recipes, they really do the trick! Lastly, do you struggle with finding the time and money to work out? Well, not anymore sister. Did you know that YouTube has millions of workout videos? It sure does. Most of them you can customize for time 5-30 minutes, your level, your fitness goals, trouble areas, and what equipment you already have or don’t have at home.  Skip the gym memberships, expensive treadmills, workout systems and so forth. Just hop on YouTube, pick a video that suits your needs for the day and get on it, then boom, all done! Quick, easy and most importantly, free! You’re welcome. Some great channels to get started with are PopSugar Fitness, and Cassie Ho of Blogalaties.

Budget Friendly Stores & Kids Activities.  When you want to go shopping or take your kids out, it’s good to find places that don’t cost a lot or anything at all. When the regular department stores are calling your name and you need to keep the spending low, opt for less expensive stores that have the same high quality stuff as the expensive places. For instance, I love shopping at Ross, Burlington Coat Factory is amazing as well, and when shopping online Zulily has great sales on the cutest things for the kids, home, and you! So skip the big shiny store and head into the more budget friendly store, trust me, you’ll be glad you did. When it comes to activities for the kids, we are tempted to pay the big bucks for things like the membership places for classes, playtime and all that jazz? Yeah, you know what I’m talking about….or what about sports? Do you have any idea how much sports cost? Like geez you might as well by car. So, when you need to save some money, just take the rugrats to the park, let them run and play, kick a ball, climb, swing and roll around in the grass. Same benefits, but it’s free. Playdates are actually great too, organize for a few of your kids friends to come over, plan a craft for them to do, teach them how to play hopscotch, put out some snacks and let the magic happen. Your kid doesn’t really need some fancy class, or to be the star soccer player, at least not until you can actually afford for them to be. Keep your priorities in check, and when they need/want some fun socialization or fresh air, just go for the free options at hand. They’ll be fine, I promise and you will be able to keep the bills paid. It’s not easy being a single mom with a low income, but just do the best you can and save money wherever you can, and when they get older, they will thank us for it. At least, we hope they will, right?

Keep on keepin’ on, working hard and being money wise. You’re fabulous and no one can say otherwise. When times are tough, we gotta get tough too and I know we can handle it. For more tips, ideas and fantastic blogs such as this, please follow my blog and stay tuned for more coming at ya soon.

Much love, peace out.

-Jess XO

When Your Child Gets Dumped Too.

Dating is hard, and when you’re a mom it’s even harder….

When you date, it’s usually a fun and flirty experience filled with late nights at the latest hot spot, cuddling on the couch or what the hip kids call *Netflix & Chill* these days , texting, swiping right and the butterflies and potential new beginnings.  But when you’re a mom, suddenly dating is no longer about all the fun, it’s a serious and dangerous world of having to not only protect yourself from harm, but also your kid/s. When they are involved, the whole dating scene changes, now you have to worry about babysitters, how much you should or shouldn’t talk about your kid/s, bringing them along for outings, if your date has kids to consider as well and how fast your kid/s bond with this person. It becomes a complicated and stressful strategy  instead of fun and flirty. Making sure your child doesn’t get hurt becomes a huge priority, as if worrying about yourself getting hurt wasn’t bad enough. If things don’t work out, how is your child going to handle it?

What happens when your child gets dumped too?

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

When a break up occurs, it’s not just about you, your child has been left as well.Not that your devastation is any less or less important, but you can’t forget that your child knew this person too and is probably feeling sad and confused. Depending on the depth of the relationship, length of time together and how this person and your child bonded, it will naturally affect how things go down afterwards. Whether the relationship lasted years or months, your child probably spent decent amounts of time around this person and got used to them being in their/your life and is feeling quite confused about the sudden shift. In most cases there usually isn’t a goodbye and explanation for them leaving and continued contact. So they may be feeling a little abandoned, especially if your child got close to this person, developed a relationship of their own and saw him as a father figure. In your heart, you probably hoped that this person would become a step parent to your child and the relationship would end in a beautiful wedding. But, things happen and when that hope was severed, the disappointment won’t be felt by you alone. Your child was probably sharing that dream right along with you.

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

All children react differently to situations like this in life, some may be heartbroken, some may just be a little sad while others may not even really care. You know your child best and will more than likely see the effects unfold over time. Questions will be asked, and you may or may not have the answers. There’s a good chance you have questions of your own and are not entirely sure yourself why the relationship ended. Even if you have all the answers it may be painful to explain them and say them out loud, most especially to your little one.

 How do we comfort our hurting child when we need comforting ourselves?  

It’s not easy.  It may be hard to get the words out as we may be feeling just as lost as our child. Probably more.

In my case, my last serious relationship ended very abruptly and mainly becasue of my child. This person could not handle my son and all the realities of dating a woman with a child, and all the things that came with that.  It all just got too much, and it all crashed and burned in a matter of breathless moments. When my son asked why this person was no longer in our life, I refrained from saying “it’s your fault” when even though in that moment, in my anger, pain and utter despair, I wanted to.  It’s been close to a year and a half now, and my son  still occasionally asks questions like “Why doesn’t (so&so) love us anymore?” ” Why can’t we ever see him again?” “Why doesn’t he call us?” The fact that’s it’s been this long and he still brings him up kills me.  This person was the closest thing my son has had to a father figure since his actual so called “father” is not in the picture. Even though we dated less than a year my son bonded with my ex very quickly and deeply. To be honest…so did I. Much to the heartbreak of us both.  What really twists the knife into the open and rotting wound….is when my son says things like this…”Mommy, do you remember (so&so)? He was my best friend and I miss him. Why can’t we just go to his house? I want to play with him today. Do you remember him mommy?” As if I have forgotten….I wonder how long I will have to respond with “Yes, I remember him baby, and we can’t see him anymore, I’m sorry.”

When will he forget? Will he forget? 

Everyone’s way of dealing with breakups and heartache are different.  Being brutally honest with yourself and your little one/s may be the way to go. Or, being more dismissive of the whole thing is best? You are the mother and adult, so you decide. Every case is different for each family.  Things may be even harder if you lived together, now the entire family dynamic has changed. Your world, and theirs are rocked. Some couples may take things slower and more traditional and opt for more causal dating and  keep a lot of their personal lives out of the picture, at least maybe at first. A lot of women decide to not even introduce their children to their new partner until a certain milestone in the relationship has passed if even ever at all. But some mothers like me, don’t have the luxury of keeping their children hidden away for every date and day spent together. Some of us, don’t have babysitters, relatives nearby or anyone to watch the munchkin while mommy goes out. There are even times when we can’t help but have a wee one in tow, because let’s get real. We’re moms. So at one point or another, our boyfriends and our kids will cross paths and the realities of being grown ups comes to a head.

No matter the situation or decisions we make in our dating life, we must never forget that our children come first. We must not loose sight of what’s most important, and that is our child’s well being. Emotional well being should always be a priority and damage can occur with them the same way it can with us. Being vulnerable to let down’s, heartbreak and getting dumped is just a part of the dating cycle we all suffer through. It just shouldn’t have to be that way for our kids too, but unfortunately…it is. So going forward, how do you go on and put yourselves through it all over again? Do you just dive right in and hope for a better outcome this time? Do you learn from certain mistakes and try again doing things differently?  Do you become one of those moms who drops the kid off somewhere to go on a date and in turn be selfish? Or heck, do you swear off love and dating all together until the kids are grown? Only you know what is ultimately right for you and your family.  You are stronger than you know, and are an empowered woman worthy and any man’s respect, so hold your head high, feel confident in your yoga pants and carry on.  A real man would want you, stretch marks, screaming kids, mom van and all and if he got hit by a bus and never shows? It’s ok girl, you got this. I promise. Now go take care of those children of the corn…I mean precious little angles…..

Image via Pinterest

Image via Pinterest

Love & Light,

Your girl – Jess. XO

Stay At Home Mom’s Guide To Sanity

So, you’re a stay at home mom? Me too. 

However you got here, whether by losing your job, taking temporary leave or by your own desire, here we are. I chose to be a SAHM and have been struggling to keep what minute ounces of sanity I have left for the last 5 years, I have had the odd online job, tried selling everything under the sun and even went back to school during this time, and am now the proud owner of my own home business and dabble in other entrepreneur activities. Though it has helped some, I still needed to find ways to keep myself from throwing myself in the looney bin. I know you feel me when you’re taking care of your child/children all day every day,or part of the day if your child/children attend school. We must learn to survive through every early morning, late night, temper tantrum and natural disaster equivalent mess. Sometimes you just need to lock yourself in the bathroom and take a breather.  So, I’ve decided to share a few of the (better) ways I’ve discovered how to handle the everyday stresses of motherhood. 

 

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Image Source: Pinterest

Follow me if you want to live…..

The Stay At Home Mom’s Guide To Sanity:

  • Find “me” time.

It probably sounds like a total “DUH” but trust me, you need to take it seriously. Creating time just for yourself is imperative to keeping hold of your sanity. If you don’t get enough time alone you’ll become a slave to the world of the short people. They can control you, consume you and turn you into a crazed zombie. Don’t let it happen! No matter when or how you have to do it, take control of your life and give yourself some time to relax and find a peaceful moment. It could be taking a hot bath after the little ones have gone to sleep, it could be browsing Pinterest while the kids are zoned out in front of the t.v, or leaving them with dad while you run a  quick errand alone, or heck, sit outside by yourself with a cup of tea and just listen to the birds sing, the wind blow and take a deep breath. Each day, whether it be for 3 minutes or an hour, make sure you get your “me time”. Mine is at 12am, but I hope you find yours at a much less late hour. 

  • Take a walk with your kid/s

This is something I try to do with my son on a regular basis, not so much in the dead of winter, but on the nice weather days he and I go for 15-30 minute walks outside, just around the house. I found that this is good for so many reasons. Not only does it give you a bit of exercise and some fresh air, but it helps you to suddenly zap out of whatever funk you’ve been in all day; yelling, cleaning, cooking, teaching, emails, phone calls etc, it all adds up and taking a break to go outside and take a walk with your little one/s is so revitalizing. It gives you energy, relaxes you and it also gives you the perfect chance to spend quality time with your child and talk to them. Ask them questions about their day, about school, their interests, their friends, their thoughts on things going on at home, and just have a real conversation. It’s good for them and good for you. They need to express their thoughts, learn conversation skills and spend time with you. You will feel a million times better, so when you’re feeling too stressed, just grab the kiddos and step outside and take a walk. Observe nature, the outside world and talk to them about it. 

  • Prep & Plan.

It may sound time-consuming but actually, it saves you time overall. Taking the time to do beforehand preparation for your daily activities, meals, etc are worth it, and also schedule out things that you need to squeeze in like homework to be done, people to get back to, shopping trips, places the kiddos need to go, things you need to remember to do around the house, set a certain time aside to get these things done. Write them down and don’t forget. Planning ahead and making the necessary preparations ahead of time make all the difference. I promise you. It saves you time, energy, and most importantly, sanity. You can find simple to follow instructions for meal prep online and you can even pick up some make-ahead food containers to make it even easier. Getting a detailed planner is an easy and fun way to write down all your “to-do’s” and schedules. You can add planner stickers, colored pens, and washi tapes to add fun and customizable detail to your planner. I highly recommend investing in something like the Erin Condren life planners. Check out all her amazing products here: Erin Condren Planners

  • Shop online.

You probably already shop online at least occasionally but don’t forget there is an entire world of products you can find in a gazillion places on the internet. No traffic, long lines, in-store temper tantrums or real pants required. If you’re having a crazy day but need to shop and it’s something you don’t need right away, avoid all the time on the road and the stress of dragging resistant little ones all over creation and just hop online. (You might even find better deals!) 

  • Rediscover your favorite game or movie to share with the kids.

It’s fun to have game and movie nights with the fam bam and sharing something special from your childhood with them not only gives you the warm and fuzzies, but it introduces them to something they’ve probably never seen before and gives you something to bond over. So dig out your old dusty favorite board game from when you were a kid or put in that classic Disney movie and cuddle up with them as you enjoy something that warms your heart and go create some new memories together. Even if they’re not that into it, at least you know you will enjoy it and have a good time in nostalgia land. 

  • Good old fashioned stress relief.

There’s nothing wrong with taking in some good old fashioned stress relief. Some great ideas are to make some chamomile or lavender tea, get friendly with a heat wrap on aching muscles, ask a friend/significant other for a massage, watch your favorite tv show before bed, or read a few chapters of a good book, do a low-key workout or take a long shower. Find something relaxing to unwind before the end of the day, do some stretches and deep breathing, tie it in with your “me time”. 

  • Connect with other SAHMS

It’s easy to let a social life disappear when you’re a stay at home mom, and staying connected to other adults is important, right? My advice is to connect with some other stay at home moms for relatable social networking. You might meet some new friends, swap stories, advice, recipes and more!  It might sound silly, but Facebook groups are awesome for this, go look up some SAHM groups now! 

I hope I’ve helped and given you hope. You can save your sanity after all! For another look at my tips, here’s my YouTube video:  My YouTube Video

 

Stay sane and stay fabulous! Follow my blog and find me on social media! 

 

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I got your back, you’re never alone.

Love, Jess XOÂ